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I discovered that I am one of the greenest people out there. See, last year I wrote this article about the holidays on giving gifts and maybe doing freelance writing for family members instead of actually giving out presents. Funny, as an article, but not great. I don't think I'd put together something like that now like I did then, especially since I have matured as a writer. I failed to mention that this year, actually, I received the prestigious Royal Academy of the Dramatic Farts Golden Who Dealt It Award, one of the most coveted in all of humor writing. Unfortunately it does mean that I am the one who dealt it.
In any case, I woke this morning bright and early so that I could put together a great holiday article for everyone. So I sat down and I wrote about how funny it would be if, in lieu of presents, you were to get someone a coupon for your services as a writer. That's so funny, I thought, typing out the article carefully as the morning light failed utterly to strain through my window (I have poor positioning of my apartment). In fact, it's so funny that I should go through the archives and read my own work again to see what other gems I have come up with. So I go back about a year from now and find out that I wrote the same damn article and I quickly switch from self-congratulating to self-flagellating. Of course it's a funny idea, you boob. You wrote the damn article on it last year.
It's frustrating really because when you write, there's only so much that you do before you realize that you're starting to copy yourself. So long as you're copying your best stuff, then I say good luck to you! After all, you're not exactly plagiarizing by stealing from yourself. And just for your reference, spelling plagiarizing is extremely hard without spell check.
That's why I'm green, though. I'm keeping it so real that I'm going to just recycle my own stuff. If anything, I'm just ripping off the funniest writer I know–Bill Cosby. Please don't read anything he's written. You already have anyway.